Ohana means family

Part of my 2004 reflections, I plan to look into each facet of my life. Here's Chapter 1 - Family:

This year my relationship with my sister deepened due to a string of events that shook my household. Remember one lazy Sunday Morning, we worshipped the Lord together with songs. As we sang to my sis' rhythmic strumming on the guitar, we felt the Presence of the Lord in the little room. I sensed a Word released from the Lord from Psalms 130: Wait for the Lord.. put hope in His unfailing love. He Himself will redeem (my family) from all our sins (e.g. idol worship).

As the year progressed, there were temptations and then sin. My sister felt the biggest impact. There were feelings of pain, betrayal, disppointment, mistrust and even fear and insecurity at home. To add on, The Storm - after brewing for sometime - blew again. The climax came when on night my sis and I found ourselves locked out of the house upon returning home from service. Thank God that the climate has since somewhat subsided. As if not enough, there was this man who loitered at our regular bus stop in the morning and whistled at my sister every time she appeared. This had been happening for about a year. I tried to accompany her to the bus stop (which means I have to be faster in getting ready for work) to at least give assurance that she was not alone... And then a hero came along. Ps Y.C saved the day! He came one morning, took a pic of the man, and threatened to publicise his pic in the media if he would not stop his nonsense. Then the man's employer came into the picture, almost picking a fight at the bus stop! I was like oh my goodness, the air was so filled with tension! Amidst all these, the bond between my sis and I strengthened. We shared more, confided in each other more. It came about with much tears and release of much pented up emotions.

We thought the worst was over. We thought better. I was away at my NPCC squad chalet on the Deepavali hols, followed by Batam trip over the Hari Raya weekend. Things happened. My sister decided to move out to stay at my grandma's place. Within a day or 2, she's gone. Suddenly our wardrobe seems so empty. No more jerks in the upper decked bed above at night... she's really gone...

For myself, I see God's hand in this. During the G12 conference last year, i sensed the Lord telling me that through me, the rest of my family will come to the Lord; I'm the key as part of His plan for my family's salvation. They will receive Christ as my life is markedly transformed by Him... I used to hide in my elder siblings' shadows. O let them run the show - I'll just be a participant. Now that my elder bro is away most of the time (as he stays in camp), my sis staying at my grandma's, my mother feeling lost for the next course of action to take, younger bro gaming ceaselessly day and night, father feeling frustated over financial woes ... if I don't do something, who will?

I felt challenged by God to somehow revolutionise the current situation. As I was reading this book "In His Steps", the challenge got more intense each day. But by my human nature, I really hate to be the one to do it. I struggled to ignore the Lord's voice with my own reasoning. Oh life goes on man. All other aspects are great. I'm enjoying my work. Our cell is picking up. But as God is pointing his finger here, I'm slowly drawn to get down on my knees to pray and submit to His Lordship over my life. It's not easy. Make or break. O Lord pls help me.

What would Jesus do?

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As we humble ourselves
Seek Your face
Fall on our knees
Turn from our ways
You will hear our cries
Wipe our sins away
And heal our land we pray!